Thursday, September 24, 2020

You're not lost, but only a dead fish goes with the flow...

I took a break from my weekend newsletter last week. In 30 weeks I've done this twice! Maybe it's time to pick a workday and stop treating my writing and musing only as my weekend side hustle and turn it into serious work. And work is done during the business week.

So many things have been on my mind lately, no wonder that there's no time to sleep with all this must-do pondering in my head! Honestly, there's a whole book up there and it won't write itself without my pausing and making my ideas a reality. Writing is still love and it helps so much when I can settle my thoughts in this way. It's a joy sharing it.

A friend of mine recently referred to himself and I as two lost souls... I gotta admit that a certain resistance bubbled up inside of me.
Lost... I've been there. But, am I still there?

What does it mean to be lost? To not have short term goals? A stable job? To not own your own house? To be single and looking? To be in a relationship and feeling confused?
Why do we always doubt ourselves and our journey? Why should there be a particular path that is the opposite of lostness? Is there a recipe for foundness?
If there is one, in my experience, it's this: Lose yourself in the deepest darkest abysses of your soul, try everything there is to try, confuse yourself to the point that you don't know who you are anymore, get rid of all material possessions, grieve over the people who came and went, pitty yourself for your smallness and then.... instead of letting it go... just welcome it. Look at yourself in the mirror and welcome what you see with an open heart and an open mind. Welcome this place of lostness, the ground zero, welcome it with joy! Laugh at your seeming shortcomings, at your colourful past, at your random way of living your amazing life, and welcome the unknown. No one quite knows who you are unless you tell them who. Rewrite your story. Creating from nothing is oftentimes the most profound. Lost is the new found.
Boldly follow your confusion! That's the green light you've been waiting for.

Yes, I'd like a tangible sense of direction, break down my long term goal into short-term goals and these into small baby steps.
In conclusion, I could use that Master degree to get myself where I want to be in 5, 10 years... Read about the energy of fear dictating the outcome of even the best of the best decisions we make here:

The excuse that we shouldn't chase after anything and just savour the moment? My current job is here to be savoured any day... in fact, it is so flexible that I could get bored with the empty gaps in between. I love my job and I was made for it. I just fancy an extra venture. A creative self-expression with a long-term perspective. I can do anything - work and study, I can do everything I set my mind to.

Going with the flow and adjusting to life events as they randomly happen or - creating by default the things that we want to happen?
Are those mutually exclusive? Does the latter mean that life wouldn't present us with any surprises? Does influencing our destiny require sticking to a timetable and never detour the entire lifetime?
For that, I need some serious mindset shifts!

What would your life look life if you trusted the people who cross your path without a seed of doubt?

We must trust our hunches.... moreover, the body never lies.... keep checking with your body frequently.